


Bar Too Far, A

by Kereng



Category: The West Wing
Genre: Episode Tag, F/M, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2003-04-15
Updated: 2003-04-15
Packaged: 2019-05-30 10:10:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 11,373
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15094550
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kereng/pseuds/Kereng
Summary: J/D Post-Ep toHoly Night





	1. Bar Too Far, A

**Author's Note:**

> A copy of this work was once archived at National Library, a part of the [ West Wing Fanfiction Central](https://fanlore.org/wiki/West_Wing_Fanfiction_Central), a West Wing fanfiction archive. More information about the Open Doors approved archive move can be found in the [announcement post](http://archiveofourown.org/admin_posts/8325).

**A Bar Too Far**

**by:** Kerry

**Character(s):** Josh, Donna, Sam  
**Pairing(s):** Josh, Donna  
**Category(s):** Romance, Post-Episode  
**Rating:** TEEN  
**Disclaimer:** I don't own `em.  
**Summary:**  
**Spoiler:** Everything through `Holy Night'  
**Author's Note:** Well, this is a kinda post-ep to Holy Night but it has Sam in it, so go figure. It's set in early January 2003. 

"You wanted to see me, Sir?" Josh said as he walked into the Oval Office and stopped in front of the President. 

"Ah, Josh.  Yes, have a seat," the President instructed, sitting down in a chair and watching Josh sit on a couch opposite. 

"What do you need, Sir?" 

"Do you guys ever hang out anymore?" the President asked, leaving Josh totally confused. 

"Sir?  What do you mean?" 

"The Senior Staff," he clarified.  "You all used to go out every so often, to bars and so on.  I don't hear any of you talking about your nights out together anymore; I just wondered if you still do that." 

Josh wondered what was behind the question but knew better than to probe too deeply, all would be revealed soon enough.  "Uh, no, I guess we don't.  We don't really have that much time." 

"Well, you need to make time."  The President looked at Josh closely before continuing.  "Josh, I know you've all given up a great deal to work here, to help me do this, and I know none of you grudge it, but you need to make time for yourselves.  I look at you all and see how stressed out you are; you, Toby, CJ, Charlie.  You need to go out for a night, relax." 

"Sir, we *really* don't really have ti-" 

"Nonsense, Josh.  There's nothing particularly pressing going on at the moment, why don't you all go out tonight?" 

"Sir, we -" 

"Josh, consider it an order," the President stated. 

"You can't really do that, you know, Sir," Josh said with amusement. 

The President peered at him.  "You want to test that theory out, Josh?" 

"Uh, no.  So, who does this order extend to, Sir?" Josh asked in defeat. 

"As I said, Toby, CJ and Charlie.  I believe Sam's in town as well for a few days to schmooze some people, in fact, I think he's in the West Wing at the moment, you should invite him as well; he needs a break from campaigning." 

"Toby's gonna blame me for this, you know," Josh grumbled quietly. 

The President let out a hearty laugh.  "I want you all out of here by 7:30, understand?" 

"Yes, Sir." 

* 

Josh spoke to Charlie as he left the Oval Office and made arrangements to go to Houlihan's that evening. 

He next visited Toby and found that Sam and CJ were also in his office.  Sam had dropped by on the pretense of a visit to catch up with everyone; he actually wanted Toby to read over a key speech for his campaign. 

"Ah, just the people I want to see," Josh said as he leaned against the open doorway. 

"What's happened?" CJ asked automatically. 

"Nothing," Josh replied.  "I just wanted to ask if you guys had plans for tonight." 

Sam, CJ and Toby shared glances before Sam finally spoke.  "What did you have in mind?" 

"Us, Charlie and a bar." 

"Why?" Toby asked a little gruffly. 

"No, Toby, that's not the response you're supposed to give.  You're supposed to say `why, thank you, Josh, I'd love to join you'," he quipped. 

"Again, why?" Toby repeated. 

Josh let his shoulders slump a little.  "President's orders.  Apparently, he's noticed we don't hang out as much anymore, and has decided we all need to relax.  Therefore, we are to go to a bar tonight and do just that.  Charlie has a free night so he's coming too." 

"I guess we don't have much of a choice then, do we?" CJ replied.  "Is Donna coming?" 

"Huh?" Josh queried. 

"You know, Donna...your assistant.  Is she coming?" 

"Uh, I'm not sure, I was gonna ask her later." 

"Well, if I were you, I'd ask her now.  I think she might have plans for later." 

Josh's head snapped up at her words and he looked directly at CJ.  "What you mean she might have plans?  What plans?  You know she and `Sailor Boy' broke up, don't you?" he said in a rush. 

CJ rolled her eyes.  "Yes, Josh, I know she and *Jack* broke up but I just heard Carol, Ginger and Bonnie making plans for later, a club or something.  I think they were gonna ask Donna to join them." 

"So, maybe I shouldn't ask her?" Josh wondered out loud, hoping his tone didn't show his disappointment. 

"Why?" Sam asked, puzzled. 

"You know, let her have her girls night out." 

"Just ask her, Josh, giver her the choice.  It'd be good to have her come with us.  I haven't had a chance to talk to Donna away from here for ages," CJ instructed. 

"Yeah," he sighed.  "It wouldn't be the same without her." 

CJ and Sam shared a look at Josh's admission while Toby muttered that they should all be working.  Josh gave them a half-smile and told them he'd catch up with them later; he then left the office. 

* 

"Hey, Donnatella," Josh said brightly as he approached Donna's desk. 

Donna gave him a look that said `what now?' before dropping her pen onto her desk and waiting for him to continue. 

"Watcha doin'?" he asked, stopping in front of her desk and smiling at her. 

"Why?" she asked warily. 

"Just wondering if you want to go out for a drink tonight, that's all." 

"Yeah?" she asked, her interest suddenly increasing. 

"Yeah.  Sam, CJ, Toby, Charlie and I are going out tonight.  I thought you might wanna come with us?  I mean, if you don't have plans already." 

Donna's shoulders slumped a little as Josh mentioned the other names but she quickly recovered her composure and smiled. 

"Sure.  That sounds good.  Where are we going?" 

"Well," Josh said quietly as he leaned closer, "I seem to remember promising you just before Christmas that I'd take you out and get you drunk.  I never fulfilled that promise, so how about we do that tonight?"  His voice held a quality that made the hairs on the back of Donna's neck stand up, and she was completely aware that her breath was catching a little. 

"Uh, yeah...I dunno about me getting drunk though, I do have to work tomorrow; but the bar sounds good." 

"Tomorrow's Saturday," Josh replied, still leaning close to her.  "We can come in late." 

"Yeah.  I'm still not gonna get drunk though," she said, looking at him and letting a smirk settle on her face.  "Someone has to make sure you get home okay after you pass out from a couple of drinks." 

"Hey!" 

Donna laughed at Josh's facial expression and shrugged her shoulders to show she couldn't resist making the comment.  Josh, with a smile on his face, relieved that she had agreed to come, turned around and started to leave her cubicle when she called him back. 

"Josh?"  He looked at her inquisitively.  "This isn't because you think I'm upset about splitting up with Jack, is it?" she asked seriously.  Josh stepped towards her desk again with an unreadable look on his face.  "Because, if it is," she continued, "there's really no need.  It's been a couple of weeks; it was never going to go anywhere anyway.  I'm fine."  The tone of her voice told Josh that she was being honest, she was okay about breaking up with Jack; he'd never asked who broke up with whom, but he suspected that Donna had been the one to end it.  Josh hoped that, after a few drinks, Donna would confirm his theory. 

"I know you're fine," he replied quietly.  "I didn't invite you because I thought you needed cheering up; I invited you because I want you to come with us." 

Before Donna could process his words, Josh walked to his office, entered and closed the door. 

* 

Wisely, they had all chosen to take cabs to the bar rather than have any of them drive.  Sam, CJ and Toby shared one cab, while Charlie, Josh and Donna, took another.  Sam's cab arrived first and he quickly spotted an empty table in a corner near the dance floor.  CJ and Toby sat down while Sam tried to round up some more chairs.  Unfortunately, he could only find another one to go with the four that had already been at the table.  He shrugged his shoulders at CJ and sat down, figuring Josh and Charlie could fight over who got to stand. 

Josh and Charlie entered the bar a few minutes later, talking loudly.  They were followed by Donna, who was doing her best to distance herself from her companions.  Sam stood up to catch their attention and beckon them over; Donna rolled her eyes as she met Sam's gaze, motioning with her head towards Josh and Charlie. 

Josh and Charlie were so absorbed in their conversation that they didn't realize that when they took the two empty seats at the table, it meant Donna had nowhere to sit down.  Sam immediately stood up to offer Donna his seat but she didn't notice; she was too busy glaring at Josh, who was still talking to Charlie. 

"Uh, Josh," CJ said loudly, so that Josh might actually notice her; he looked at her with confusion.  "You just stole Donna's seat," she pointed out. 

Josh looked around at everyone and saw Donna standing beside his chair, tapping her foot on the floor. 

"What, this seat has Donna's name on it?" he smirked.  He twisted in his seat to look at the back of the chair.  "Nope, no `Donnatella Moss' written here."  CJ reached over and smacked the back of his head.  "Ow!"  He rubbed his head and glared at CJ before turning to look at Donna.  "Why don't you go and get another chair, Donna?" he suggested. 

"There aren't any," Sam stated.  Josh quickly glanced around the bar, stretching his neck instead of standing up from his seat, and nodded his head in agreement. 

"Well, I guess I should act like a gentlemen and offer my seat," Josh said in mock resignation. 

"Why, Joshua," Donna retorted in a tone dripping with sarcasm, "how kind of you.  I'm not putting you out or anything, am I?" 

"Just sit down, Donna, before I change my mind," he warned with a grin.  Donna removed her coat and draped it over the back of the chair, on top of Josh's own coat, before sitting down and placing her purse on the table.  Josh stood beside the chair and fidgeted for a moment, hoping someone in the bar would recognize him and rush to his aid with a spare seat.  When no-one appeared, he decided on another course of action.  "Hey, Donna, why don't you go and get us all some drinks while I look for another chair?" 

Donna raised her eyebrows.  "Why do *I* have to go and get the drinks in?"  Josh handed her his wallet.  "Okay," she grinned, "what's everyone having?"  She made a mental note of everybody's drink order and headed for the bar.  Josh remained standing beside the now empty chair while his eyes scoured the bar for another seat. 

"It's Friday night, Josh," CJ explained.  "This place is always busy on a Friday.  You have to get here really early if you want a seat." 

"Yeah," he replied absently, his attention having now been caught by the sight of Donna chatting to a guy standing next to her at the bar.  He snapped out of his thoughts as he saw Donna placing the order with the barman and he sat back down in his seat. 

"What were you guys arguing about anyway?" CJ asked Charlie and Josh. 

"We weren't arguing," Josh replied.  "We were having a discussion." 

CJ quirked an amused eyebrow.  "Well, Donna didn't exactly seem interested in your *discussion* and it was certainly *loud*.  What were you discussing?" 

"Well, I was explaining to our young friend, Charlie, that I have a new project." 

"Yeah, what's that?" Sam asked with obvious interest. 

"He wants to have a new word entered in the dictionary; a word that he's created," Charlie explained.  Toby became interested in the conversation and looked at Charlie for further enlightenment, while Sam and CJ shared amused glances.  "Josh reckons if he gets enough people to say the new word, it'll have to be put in the dictionary." 

"What's the word?" 

Josh grinned at CJ before he replied.  "Lymanesque." 

Sam and CJ burst out laughing and even Toby couldn't resist a wry smile at the serious, yet smug expression on Josh's face. 

"What?  It's a good word," Josh defended. 

"Yet, Charlie didn't agree?" CJ guessed. 

"On the contrary," Josh replied haughtily, "Charlie thinks it's a great word.  We were just trying to come up with the description for it, you know, how they'd explain it in the dictionary." 

Donna returned at that moment with a tray of drinks and set it down on the table. 

"Have you heard about the new word, Donna?" Sam asked with a large smirk. 

Donna rolled her eyes.  "I was trying to ignore it.  I didn't think Josh's ego should get any larger; this bar is cramped enough already," she quipped dryly, passing out the drinks to everyone while she remained standing. 

"I bet you could come up with a description for `Lymanesque', Donna" CJ declared with a devious grin. 

"Oh, you bet I can," she replied.  "First though," she looked at Josh, "am I gonna get my seat back?" 

"No, but we can share," he answered, shifting in the seat to give her a little space and tugging on her arm to make her sit down.  The chair wasn't particularly large and the only way they could fit on it together was for Donna to angle herself slightly so that her right hip was pressed firmly against Josh's left and her legs were pointed out to the left, towards CJ.  Josh was finding it difficult to stay on the chair so he stretched his left arm along the back of the seat and gripped it lightly. 

"So, what's your suggestion for the meaning of Lymanesque then, Donna?" CJ asked, noticing with delight that Josh was narrowing his eyes in preparation for Donna's response. 

Donna thought for a moment and then turned her head to grin at Josh.  "Lymanesque: to do things in an arrogant and cocky manner," she stated matter-of-factly.  Sam, Toby, Charlie and CJ let out loud laughs. 

"Hey!" Josh exclaimed, moving his head so that it was almost touching Donna's and ignoring the laughs from his friends.  "I'm not like that all the time, you know," he whispered into her ear, the movement of his mouth and his words going unnoticed by everyone else. 

Donna turned her head again so that this time her mouth was against Josh's ear.  "I know, that's why I was going to add `with an undercurrent of sweetness and charm.'  I just didn't want to be seen to be boosting your ego in public," she whispered back to him.  Josh's arm gently slipped from the back of the chair, down behind Donna's back, to settle on her waist.  She instinctively pushed herself a little closer to him, without forcing him any further off the chair.  Only CJ, sitting beside Donna, was aware that Josh's arm had moved and she smiled quietly to herself. 

"What's this?" Sam asked a moment later as the laughter at Josh's expense died down; he picked up something from the tray that Donna had set on the table. 

"Oh, it's a menu," Donna replied.  "They do food here and although the place is busy, the barman said that food orders aren't taking long.  I figured you would all be hungry so I grabbed some menus." 

"Great idea," CJ said, snatching another menu from the tray.  Toby and Charlie followed suit but Josh left the final one on the tray. 

Donna looked at him.  "Aren't you hungry?" 

"I'm okay," Josh replied. 

"Josh, you should eat something," Donna stated. 

"I'm fine," he repeated. 

"You're not.  You've hardly eaten all day, and besides, you need to put a lining on your stomach to sop up that beer you're drinking or it will affect your system a lot faster than normal, and we both know that's not good," she insisted with a grin. 

Josh glared at her but reached for the menu with his free hand.  "What do you want?" he asked, struggling to open the menu with only one hand. 

"I'm not hungry," Donna replied, taking the menu from him, opening it out and laying it on the table in front of them. 

"Donna, you just gave me a whole speech about not eating properly, and yet, *you're* not going to eat anything?" 

"I ate a big lunch while you were in a meeting, I'm fine."  Josh looked dubious.  "Really," she confirmed. 

"So, if I order something, you swear you won't try to eat it?" he inquired with a smirk. 

"Josh, just order some damn food, would you!" CJ requested loudly. 

"Alright," he grumbled.  "I'm just checking that I don't need to order two portions of everything in case my assistant decides to steal my food again." 

As Donna narrowed her eyes and prepared to argue with Josh, the waitress arrived to take everyone's orders.  Sam, Toby, Charlie and CJ each ordered soup and a sandwich with no problems but Josh was having a hard time choosing what sandwich filling he wanted. 

"Get tuna," Donna suggested. 

"That's your favorite," he replied.  "You're planning on eating my sandwich, aren't you?" he accused. 

"No, I'm not.  Everyone is waiting on you so I thought I'd make the decision for you, you like tuna."  She turned to the waitress.  "He'll have the tomato soup and a tuna sandwich." 

"Should I have asked for two spoons?" Josh quipped sarcastically as the waitress left; Donna shot him a glare and he shut up. 

* 

"See, I knew this would happen," Josh complained as they were eating their soup. 

"What?" CJ questioned. 

"Donna.  She wants some of my soup," he said. 

"Josh, I never said a word," Donna defended. 

"You didn't have to.  You keep dipping your head and breathing in the soup aroma, which means you're hogging the taste by the way; you're trying to make me offer you some," he whined. 

"I am not!" 

"Good, that's okay then," he grinned as he put another spoonful of soup into his mouth and savored it loudly.  Donna glared at him as he took another mouthful and he finally relented.  "Donna, would you like to try some of my soup, it's really good," he offered, holding his spoon out to her. 

"K," she agreed, but making no move to take the spoon from his hand.  He got the message and plunged the spoon into the bowl, bringing it back up full of soup and holding it towards Donna's mouth.  She opened her mouth and he fed her the soup, his eyes watching her lips as they closed around the spoon for a second before releasing it so he could remove it from her mouth.  CJ was watching Josh and Donna closely as she ate but she said nothing, just smiled to herself again and shared a look with Sam. 

"I hope you're not wanting any of this sandwich," Josh said to Donna when the rest of their food arrived.  "If you are, you're just going to have to want; this is all mine," he continued, pulling the plate close to him and wrapping his free arm around it protectively. 

"Eat it yourself, see if I care," Donna replied, letting her manner match Josh's childish actions.  He did just that and finished the first half of the sandwich in three large bites to prove a point.  Once he had taken his first, smaller, bite out of the other half, he noticed CJ push her plate, containing the untouched second half of her sandwich, towards Donna.  Donna shook her head gently but Josh knew she was tempted.  CJ gave Donna an, `are you sure?' look before taking the plate back and starting the rest of her sandwich. 

"Here, have some of mine," Josh said quietly in Donna's ear as he held the sandwich out for her to take.  She looked at him for a moment, then at his partly eaten sandwich and then back at him.  "It's okay, you won't catch anything," he smirked.  "Just leave me some, okay?"  Donna nodded, took the sandwich from him and ate a piece. 

CJ leaned over to Donna.  "My sandwich not good enough, huh?" she asked with a smile. 

Donna looked a little caught out for a moment before replying, "Josh has tuna.  It's my favorite."  CJ gave Donna a look that showed she didn't believe her but she didn't comment further. 

* 

Soon after they finished eating, Charlie challenged Josh to a game of pool.  Josh accepted the challenge in his usual modest manner - claiming he was going to kick Charlie's ass.  Toby kept quiet but smirked as he remembered previously falling victim to Charlie's pool prowess.  Donna took advantage of Josh standing up by making herself comfortable in their chair.  Noticing the near-empty glasses on the table, Josh gave Donna his wallet and instructed her to buy another round when she was ready.  He and Charlie then headed for the pool table. 

About twenty minutes later, Sam approached Josh at the pool table. 

"Hey, Josh, who's winning?" 

"Shut up," Josh replied morosely; Charlie was beating him hands down.  Josh had been so full of himself about how good a pool player he was, he had stupidly agreed to Charlie's proposed wager - the next time the President decided to impart some lengthy knowledge to Charlie, he was going to tell the President it was something Josh was interested in.  Josh would have no option but to comply and it would give Charlie a chance to escape, as the President didn't care who his audience was, so long as he had someone to torture. 

"Oooookay," Sam said, smirking at Josh's glum face.  Charlie moved down to the far end of the table to decide which shot he was going to take, giving Sam the opportunity to talk to Josh in private.  "So, you having a good time tonight, Josh?" 

"Yeah, it's been good." 

"Hmmm." 

Josh looked at Sam curiously.  "What does `hmmm' mean?" 

"Nothing," Sam replied with a shrug of his shoulders. 

"Sam." 

"Okay, well, it's just..." 

"Sam," Josh repeated with impatience. 

"Yeah, right, I just don't-Okay, you shouldn't have a problem with this; you yourself have told me you don't have a problem with this-" 

"Sam?  What the hell?" 

Sam stared at Josh for a moment before continuing.  "Donna just told me that she's gonna be buying the drinks for the rest of the evening." 

"Using my wallet, no doubt," Josh commented grumpily. 

"Yeah, probably.   But, that's not the reason.  She wants to go to the bar a lot." 

"What?  Why?" Josh asked quickly, straining to catch a glimpse of Donna through the crowd but not being able to see her. 

"Umm...there's a guy at the bar who keeps talking to her; I think he's hitting on her."  Josh's head snapped back to Sam.  "She says he seems pretty nice, soooo...she wants to hang out at the bar a lot." 

"It's not gonna happen," Josh stated forcefully, his eyes looking for Donna once again. 

"Relax, Josh, she's at the table with Toby and CJ," Sam informed him; Josh's shoulders relaxed and he gave Sam his attention once more.  "What's `not gonna happen' by the way?" 

"Why are you telling me this, Sam?" Josh asked, deflecting Sam's question. 

"No reason.  I just came over to see how badly you were getting beaten by Charlie and I thought I'd mention how glad Donna is that she came here tonight."  Sam looked at Josh pointedly.  "I didn't think you'd have a problem with that, after all, you don't get jealous, do you?" 

"No, I don't," Josh replied unconvincingly. 

"And, of course, you helped her get a first date with her last boyfriend." 

"Right."  Josh's head was dipped but Sam knew that he was tense; he could see the firm set of his jaw. 

"Although, I did hear that you almost sabotaged her skiing trip with him at Christmas." 

"That wasn't my fault," Josh defended. 

"Right," Sam agreed.  "But, you know, I did also hear that you were a little pissed when she managed to make the trip after all." 

Josh raised his head to look at Sam.  "She didn't say goodbye," he said sadly.  "I didn't get a chance to wish her a happy Christmas." 

"I know," Sam said, placing a hand on Josh's shoulder.  "Even though you don't get jealous, were you happy when they broke up?" he asked quietly. 

Josh gave Sam an unreadable look before gazing at his shoes, remaining silent.  He finally lifted his head and looked behind Sam and through the thinning crowd to their table near the dance floor.  A slightly alarmed look appeared on his face. 

"Where are Toby and CJ?" 

"Huh?" Sam queried, turning to follow Josh's gaze.  He noted Donna sitting alone at their table and then spotted CJ and Toby on the dance floor.  "Ha," Sam laughed, "I guess Toby gave in after all." 

"Sam, go back to the table, now," Josh directed. 

"What?"  Sam turned around again and saw the guy from the bar approaching Donna.  "Don't you wanna go over?" he asked Josh. 

"No.  I'm playing pool," Josh replied, noticing Charlie drumming his fingers against the pool table. 

"Right, well, I guess I'll go back and join Donna then," Sam said, nodding at Charlie and heading back to the table.  Josh watched him until he reached the table and the guy talking to Donna went back to his barstool. 

* 

Once the pool game was over, Josh and Charlie hung out by the table for a while, with Josh glancing over at their friends regularly.  He finally started to walk towards them when Donna had excused herself to go to the bathroom.  Without saying a word, Josh grabbed his wallet from the table and headed to the bar.  Toby and CJ were getting the lowdown from Charlie on how badly he'd beaten Josh and neither noticed Sam watching Josh closely; Josh was now talking to the guy who'd been hitting on Donna.  His body language allowed Sam to easily figure out what they were discussing and he grinned a little before noticing Donna returning from the bathroom. 

"Hey, need a hand?" Sam asked as he approached Josh at the bar. 

"No, I'm fine," Josh replied, glaring at the man standing next to him. 

"Yeah, well I thought I'd better hurry you up; Donna's on her way back and she looks thirsty."  At Sam's words, Josh grabbed the tray of drinks from the bar, cast another glare at the man he'd been talking to and stalked back to the table.  Sam and Josh just beat Donna back and Josh immediately took the chair he and Donna had previously shared.  Donna wasn't phased this time and just sat down beside him, nudging him out of the way a little with her elbow. 

* 

They all chatted amiably for a while, mixing work-related issues and Sam's campaigning strategies alongside talk about sports, family, and general interests.  Donna noticed that no-one asked her what had happened between her and Jack; no-one had asked her since she'd told Josh that they'd split up. 

When they ran out of drinks once more, Donna took Josh's wallet and headed for the bar before he could stop her.  Sam and Josh had been in the middle of a conversation before Donna stood up but Josh was no longer listening; he was concentrating solely on Donna, watching as she placed their drinks orders and turned to talk to the guy at the bar who had been hitting on her all evening.  After a few seconds, Donna's back stiffened and she glanced back at Josh, anger in her eyes.  She turned back to the man, said something to him and then snatched the tray of drinks from the barman, walking back to the table quickly. 

Everyone at the table had their attention grabbed as Donna slammed the tray down, sloshing the drinks everywhere. 

"You," she said to Josh angrily, staring down at him, "dancefloor, now!" 

"Donna, I-" 

"Can it, Josh!  I want to talk to you, in private." 

"Well, the dancefloor is hardly the place for that," he objected. 

"On the contrary," she stated.  "There are plenty of people there, it's crowded and noisy; it's *exactly* the place for our conversation.  Move, now!"  She grabbed his arm and dragged him forcefully to the dancefloor.  CJ looked to Toby, wondering if she should intervene but he shook his head slightly, telling her to stay where she was and let them sort it out for themselves.  Toby then looked to Sam and noticed his guilty look. 

"What did you do?" Toby asked roughly. 

"Nothing, I just..."  Sam looked towards the dancefloor and saw Donna and Josh standing in a corner, staring at each other.  "This wasn't meant to happen," Sam stated quietly, while he watched Donna put her hands on Josh's shoulders, trying to make it look like they were dancing; her posture, however, showed how tense she was and Josh was refusing to meet her eyes, his arms dangling by his sides. 


	2. Bar Too Far, A 2

**A Bar Too Far**

**by:** Kerry

**Character(s):** Josh, Donna, Sam  
**Pairing(s):** Josh, Donna  
**Category(s):** Romance, Post-Episode  
**Rating:** TEEN  
**Disclaimer:** I don't own `em.  
**Summary:**  
**Spoiler:** Everything through `Holy Night'  
**Author's Note:** Well, this is a kinda post-ep to Holy Night but it has Sam in it, so go figure. It's set in early January 2003. 

* * *

"Who the hell do you think you are?" Donna spat at Josh after a few tense moments of staring angrily at him.  "Oh, wait," she continued acerbically, "that's right, you're my boyfriend.  At least, you are according to Blane." 

"Blane?" Josh asked quizzically, finally meeting Donna's eyes and seeing them full of fire. 

"The guy at the bar, Josh." 

Josh smirked.  "His name's Blane?"  The fierce look Donna gave him told him he wasn't helping matters. 

"You told him you were my boyfriend," Donna accused furiously. 

"I didn't." 

"He says you did!" 

"I didn't, I never said that," Josh defended firmly. 

"But you warned him off, right?" she asked, her anger increasing as Josh lamely shrugged his shoulders. 

"Not as such, no.  I might have pointed a couple of things out to him, but -" 

"Do you know what he *said* to me, Josh?"  Josh swallowed hard as he heard the hurt in her tone.  "I went to the bar for more drinks and asked how he was doing.  He...he turned to me, and..."  Donna's voice cracked and she dipped her head for a moment before returning blazing eyes to meet Josh's.  "He said, and I quote, `you are the type of woman that gives your gender a bad name.  You're nothing more than a tease.  You use people.  I talked to you because I thought you seemed nice and then I find out you're just using me to get back at your boyfriend or something...using me to make him jealous.  There are words for women like you.'  That's what he said to me, Josh."  Donna was blinking back tears and she gripped Josh's shoulders tightly as she regained her strength.  "What the hell did you say to him?" 

Josh let out a long sigh; not wanting to answer her question but knowing it was one she wouldn't let him avoid.  He dipped his head and kept his voice low and controlled.  "I never said I was your boyfriend," he restated.  "I just asked him if he'd noticed where you had been sitting all night and that you'd been sharing my food.  I guess he drew his own conclusions." 

"Oh yeah," Donna shouted, unable to control her voice, "he drew conclusions alright.  But you said more to him than that, didn't you?" 

Josh looked at her but remained silent; however, his eyes told her what she suspected and she stared at him fiercely again.  "I didn't say anything else, he said something to me," he finally admitted. 

"What?" 

"He said if he'd known you were mine he'd have backed off sooner."  The words left Josh's mouth before his brain kicked into gear.  When he realized what he'd said he tried to step away but Donna dug her nails into him. 

"And what did you say to him about *that*?" 

"I didn't say anything, I thought it was better not to.  Look Donna, I'm sorry.  I thought I was helping," Josh said lamely. 

"Helping?  How the hell did you figure that?" 

"Well, he was hitting on you; I didn't think you'd want that.  C'mon, his name's *Blane* for God's sake." 

"Josh, I didn't *ask* you for help.  I'm more than capable of handling things on my own; if I'd wanted him to back off I'd have told him."  Bitterness was oozing from Donna's tone and Josh couldn't think of anything to say to diffuse the situation.  He glanced over to the table and saw his friends watching them closely but making no attempt to help him out. 

"You can't seriously tell me you're interested in *him*," he stated incredulously, looking back at Donna. 

"He's nice, Josh.  Or, at least he *was*.  If what you say is true though, he thinks I belong to *you*," she snapped. 

"I didn't tell him I was your boyfriend," Josh said with irritation. 

"No, but when he said that I was *yours* you didn't tell him differently.  Is that what you think, Josh?  That I'm some kind of... possession?" she yelled. 

"Donna, -" 

"Forget it, I need to cool off," Donna said coarsely, letting his shoulders go and pushing him away before heading out of the bar. 

Josh took off after her.  "Donna?" he yelled, pushing his way through the crowded dance floor towards the exit.  Sam started to get up from the table to follow them but CJ stopped him, telling him to give them time to sort it out their way. 

* 

Josh found her leaning against a wall just outside the bar; her face slightly illuminated by the glow of the single streetlamp. 

"Donna?" he said quietly as he walked towards her.  She turned away.  "Donna?" he repeated, now standing beside her.  "I...I'm sorry.  I don't think of you like that, you know I don't." 

She whirled round to face him and he was shocked; he had half-expected to see her crying but, although her eyes were bloodshot, it was due to anger, not tears. 

"Why did you warn him off, Josh?" she asked pointedly, turning again so that her back was against the wall.  Josh leaned his own back against the wall, his left shoulder almost touching her right. 

"He looks like an idiot.  You're not supposed to be dating gomers anymore." 

"That's not the reason," she stated, pulling away from the wall and looking at him again.  He blinked in surprise and moved away from the wall as well, turning so that he was side-on to it and making Donna turn so that she was still facing him. 

"It's not?" he asked, trying to figure out where she was going with the conversation. 

"You were jealous," she said, not so much an accusation as another statement. 

"What?" he replied, giving his tone an air of incredulity while he tried to hide the large gulp he was taking. 

"You don't want me dating anyone.  You think things have just got back to normal after Jack and I broke up and you don't want them to change again; you don't want me leaving at a reasonable time so that I can have a social life.  You want me to stay late to help you work.  You think that if you're single I should be as well; misery loves company after all."  She had moved closer to him during her tirade, subconsciously trying to gain the upper hand as it forced him to step backwards, meaning she had control. 

"That's not true," he shot back.  "I'm not jealous of that." 

"Really?" she replied with total disbelief.  "Josh, I saw you." 

"What?"  He was confused. 

"When I told you Jack and I broke up; you said you needed me to work late and that you'd call Jack and apologize.  I told you there was no need because we'd split up.  You tried to hide it, but I saw it; there was a smile on your face, and in your eyes.  It was only for an instant, but I saw it.  You were glad," she yelled, her voice getting louder with every word.  "You thought, `great, she won't complain about working longer hours again'." 

"You're wrong," he defended, raising his voice to match her yell.  "I never thought that."  Donna's eyes showed she didn't believe him and Josh didn't know how to convince her.  He stared at her in silence for a moment, anger and frustration pouring from each of them. 

"You're lying," Donna accused.  It was the last straw for Josh and he grabbed her arms, pulling her roughly to him and placing his lips on hers.  Donna's eyes widened in shock and she instantly pulled back from him, bringing her right hand up to slap him hard across his left cheek. 

Josh reeled back, stunned, and he brought his left hand up to cover his stinging cheek.  "Wow, that's...that's not the reaction I was expecting," he said in shock. 

"Just what the hell *did* you expect?" Donna demanded.  Before Josh had a chance to reply, they were both startled by a voice from the shadows. 

"Donna, you'd better put this on, you're going to freeze out here," CJ said quietly as she approached them both.  She handed Donna her coat and purse as Josh turned around. 

"CJ, what are you doing out here?" he asked with obvious irritation. 

"I saw you both leave the bar and decided to give it a few minutes.  When you didn't come back in, I figured you'd be going home, one way or the other, and I didn't think you'd want to come back inside for your stuff," CJ replied calmly, handing Josh his coat. 

"Thanks," he said gruffly.  "Now, if you don't mind, Donna and I have things to discuss." 

"Really?" CJ asked, raising her eyebrows and motioning behind Josh with her head.  He whirled around and saw Donna getting into a cab. 

"Donna," he yelled, starting to run after her; CJ placed a restraining hand on his arm.  "CJ, let me go, I need to sort this out," he yelled angrily, trying to pull his arm from her grasp. 

"No, Josh, you need to let her calm down.  She's in no mood to talk to you right now." 

Josh stared at her.  "What do you mean?  How long have you been out here?" he asked agitatedly. 

"Long enough to know the reason she slapped you.  Do you know the reason though, Josh?" she asked pointedly. 

Josh hung his head and replied quietly, "Because I kissed her." 

"No, that's not the reason, Josh."  He lifted his head to stare at her in astonishment.  "She slapped you because of what *she* thinks is the reason you kissed her." 

He walked back to the wall and slumped against it, shrugging on his coat along the way.  He looked at CJ with pleading eyes, begging her to explain her meaning to him. 

"What do you mean, CJ?" he asked quietly; he sounded lost and confused. 

"Josh, why do you do this?" she asked gently, standing in front of him.  "You're a smart guy but you do really stupid things sometimes.  Why?" 

"It's part of my charm," he said bitterly with a shrug of his shoulders, his eyes full of sadness.  "Why do *you* think I kissed her, CJ?" he whispered, his voice beginning to crack. 

"Oh, I *know* why you kissed her, Josh," she replied.  "But I doubt Donna is thinking the same way I am." 

"Okay, why does *she* think I kissed her?" he asked through a sigh. 

"To shut her up." 

"What?" he asked sharply.  "I don't...I don't understand.  Why would she think *that*?" 

"She'd just put you on the spot, Josh.  She called you on being jealous and you had no real answer for her, since you didn't want to tell her the truth.  You then grabbed her and kissed her, roughly.  What was she supposed to think?" 

"I don't..." he trailed off, his mind whirring with thoughts but none of them making sense. 

"Josh, you and Donna have unconsciously set a level for yourselves, for your relationship.  Most people have a line, but for you two, it's like a bar; you raise it every so often and your relationship progresses as you jump it, like a hurdle.  Tonight though," CJ said quietly, forcing him to meet her gaze, "you limboed right on under it.  You hit below the bar and Donna doesn't understand why.  You do too good a job at hiding your feelings, Josh.  I thought you'd figured things out."  She stopped and looked at him pointedly and he gave her a look of confusion.  "Leo told me that you seemed to be realizing the depth of your feelings; he wanted me to be prepared.  I thought Donna dating Jack was finally making you face things.  When they broke up and you didn't make a move, I actually thought you were gonna do the right thing...that you were going to take things slowly, make her understand how you feel and let her face her own realizations.  But instead, you threw all that out the window tonight." 

"I -"  Josh sighed again and dragged his hands over his face and roughly through his hair.  "How do I fix this, CJ?" he asked with desperation. 

CJ rubbed her hands up and down Josh's forearms comfortingly.  "Go and talk to her.  Be honest with her; she deserves it, Josh." 

"I thought you said I should wait and let her calm down?" 

"That was because *you* needed to figure out why you'd upset her so much.  If you'd gone over there thinking she was just mad about you kissing her, you'd have screwed things up even more.  Go, now." 

"Thanks, CJ," he said seriously, giving her a brief hug before walking towards the curb to hail a cab. 

"Josh?"  He looked back at her.  "Be *very* thankful that there was no-one out here to recognize you and Donna tonight.  Who you are doesn't matter as much, now that we're in our second term, but it would still make for very damaging press if...well, you know."  Josh nodded and stepped into the cab that had now stopped for him. 

CJ watched the cab drive away and wondered what she was going to say to her companions.  She didn't think Josh and Donna would appreciate her telling them about the kiss and subsequent slap, but she was going to have to tell them something. 

* 

Josh fumbled with his key chain as he stood outside the entrance to Donna's apartment building.  He had no intention of actually letting himself into her apartment with his keys, but he knew she probably wouldn't buzz him into the building.  Someone exited the building at that moment and he sent up a silent `thank you' as he caught the door before it closed and started to walk up the stairs. 

Donna heard him pounding on her door and told him to go away. 

"Donna, I have a key, you know.  I could just let myself in." 

"The key won't do you much good," she said with a harsh laugh, as she opened the door just enough to show him that the security chain was engaged. 

"Please, Donna," he begged.  "We need to talk.  I...I need to explain." 

"I don't want to hear it, Josh," she said tiredly. 

"Donna." 

She let out a long sigh and unhooked the chain, holding the door open for him to enter and then closing it behind him.  Josh noticed that she had removed her coat but was still wearing her work clothes; she probably hadn't got home that long before he arrived. 

"Is your roommate here?" he asked quietly. 

"No, she's at her boyfriend's." 

"Good."  Josh removed his coat and tossed it over the back of the couch. 

"I don't know why you bothered to take your coat off, Josh," Donna said pointedly.  "You won't be staying long." 

"Donna, you accused me of something at the bar.  I deserve the opportunity to defend myself," he said resolutely. 

"*You* deserve?" she yelled.  "God, you're such an arrogant-" 

"Donna," he interrupted.  "I...Please, can we sit down and talk about this?" he asked quietly. 

"You can sit down if you want, I'm gonna stand," she replied as she turned her back to him and walked to the window. 

"I'm not drunk, Donna," he blurted out as an almost pre-emptive strike; something in the back of his brain was telling him that he should make that clear.  "I've had a couple of beers, but I am most definitely *not* drunk."  She glanced back at him for a moment, raising her eyebrows skeptically and then returning her gaze to the window.  "Believe me," he continued, "in a way I wish I *was* drunk, then I could blame what happened on that fact.  That would be the easy option though, and I've never been one to do things the easy way." 

A snort of contemptuous laughter escaped from Donna's lips but she kept her back to him. 

"What do you want, Josh?" she asked quietly, her voice full of forced control. 

"To sort things out." 

Donna finally turned around as she heard the determination in his voice.  "There's nothing to sort out." 

Josh rose from the couch and walked towards her but Donna raised a hand to stop him.  "Donna, please, let me explain what happened earlier." 

"Oh, I *know* what happened, Josh.  You kissed me."  Her tone told him that she was still angry and that she still didn't understand his reasons. 

"Donna," he took another step forward but she turned her back on him again and he retreated to the couch in an attempt to put her more at ease.  "You've got this all wrong," he said quietly. 

"Oh, so this is another *dumb Donna* moment, is it?" she snapped. 

"What?" Josh yelled, leaping from the couch and moving to stand behind her at the window.  He placed a hand on her shoulder and she flinched at his touch, stepping to the side and away from him.  "Donna, when have I *ever* said you were dumb?  Or treated you that way?  Please, tell me, because I honestly have no recollection of it...at least, not in a serious way; you know I tease you though, right?  You know I never mean it...don't you?"  He sounded panicked and Donna felt her heart beat a little faster. 

"I know, Josh.  I'm sorry, I shouldn't have said that; you didn't deserve it," she admitted, glancing at him briefly.  "I know why you did it tonight, Josh.  Why you warned off Blane."  

Josh's eyes grew wide and he swallowed hard before speaking.  "Wh... What do you mean?" he asked shakily. 

"You didn't want me getting hurt," she said simply; however, there was no softness in her tone, nothing to indicate she appreciated his attempts to protect her.  "You think I've just gotten over being dumped by Jack and anything else could tip me over the edge or something." 

"No," he said forcefully.  "That's definitely *not* the reason."  Donna finally looked at him, raising her eyes to meet his.  "I never thought Jack dumped you, I think *you* were the one to end it." 

She raised her eyebrows but gave no hint as to whether his thoughts were correct.  "What makes you think that?" she asked neutrally. 

"I don't know.  Just something...I don't know.  I'm right though, aren't I?" he replied quietly, dipping his head to meet her now lowered eyes. 

"Yes," she whispered.  "How come you never asked me before?  About who ended it?" 

He shrugged his shoulders.  "I figured you'd tell me when you were ready, if you wanted me to know.  Can I ask now though?  I mean, why did you end it?  What happened?" 

"Nothing happened."  She stared out the window again.  "There was nothing there.  He's...he's a nice guy but he's kinda...boring," she confessed.  "I need someone who challenges me; he didn't." 

Josh felt his heart beat faster but he ignored it, not wanting to assume anything.  "When I said you were wrong, I meant...when you accused me of being jealous earlier, you were wrong." 

"I wasn't," she immediately retorted.  "I could see it in your eyes, Josh.  I was right." 

"No, you were wrong.  Well, you were half-right.  I was jealous, but not for the reason you said." 

Donna thought for a moment, repeating his words from earlier in her mind; he'd said, "I'm not jealous of that".  "So, what *are* you jealous of?" she demanded suddenly. 

"I..."  Josh didn't know how to answer her; he was still afraid to voice his thoughts.  He scrubbed a hand across his face and realized that his hand was trembling due to his emotions.  His hand fell to his side and he walked back to the couch; he suddenly felt very tired and knew he had to sit down and think about what he was going to say. 

"Are you alright?"  Donna's question, and the concern in her voice, surprised him, although he knew it shouldn't; she was always concerned about everyone. 

"Yeah, I'm fine," he said softly.  "I think it's time I got some things out in the open."  Donna looked shocked and Josh closed his eyes for a moment, opening them again to find her standing in front of him. 

"What do you mean?" she asked hesitantly.  He waved towards a chair and she sat down, staring at him intently. 

"Remember at Christmas, when we thought you were going to miss the first night of your ski trip..." he trailed off, not wanting to mention Jack's name and their romantic getaway.  Donna nodded.  "Well, remember I said it wasn't what it looked like and you asked me what I'd meant?"  She nodded again.  "Well, I wasn't entirely honest with you in my answer," he admitted.  "The reason I said that is because I thought you knew." 

"Knew what?" 

"That I try to sabotage your dates." 

"What?" she asked in a very controlled tone, staring at him.  "What do you mean?" 

"I didn't do it on purpose, or at least I didn't *think* I did, but... The thing with Jack, that definitely wasn't anything to do with me," he clarified.  "However, in the past, I have made you stay late, or come back to work, or whatever, in an attempt to sabotage things," he continued, sounding guilty and repentant. 

Donna couldn't believe what she was hearing and she was stunned into silence for a moment, trying to comprehend what he was saying.  "Why would you do that?" she asked in confusion. 

"I...I *thought* it was for the reasons you mentioned earlier; because I wanted you to help me when I was working, so that I wouldn't be alone.  I never really gave myself time to think about the *real* reason," he admitted. 

"Which is?" she asked pointedly. 

"That I didn't want you dating anyone because I was jealous.  I only figured this out a few weeks ago, well, about a couple of months ago... when you asked me to get Jack to ask you out.  He pointed some things out to me and they got me thinking.  I then -" 

"What did he say?" she interrupted to ask. 

"Huh?" 

"Jack.  What did he *point out*?" 

"Oh.  He said that I kept talking about you and that he thought he might be getting in between something if he asked you out."  Donna sat silently in her chair, waiting for him to continue.  "I told him he was wrong, but...he got me thinking.  I soon realized he was right; I *did* keep talking about you but more to the point, I kept *thinking* about you, constantly."  He looked at Donna's stunned face and tried to lighten the atmosphere by adding, "Well, you know, when I'm not running the country or doing anything important." 

"Josh."  Her tone told him that he had to continue, she needed to know more and he had to be open with her; she wasn't confident enough to assume anything. 

"Yeah.  Anyway, I thought back over a lot of things and I realized that I was jealous, I'd always been jealous.  Not because you were dating *someone*, but because you were dating *anyone*.  Not because I was on my own, but because I wasn't with *you*."  He looked at her and sighed deeply; the sound made her look up at him again.  "You accused me of being glad when you and Jack broke up; you were right.  I thought that, finally, I was going to get a chance to show you how I felt.  When you went away with him for Christmas, it hit me how much I was going to miss you...how much it hurt that you didn't say goodbye before leaving, that I didn't get a chance to wish you a Happy Christmas.  I knew I couldn't tell you that I finally understood things; it wasn't fair to lay all that on you, especially not when you were in a relationship with a decent guy.  When you told me you'd broken up, I...I almost told you, but I'd thought about things *a lot* by then and I decided I couldn't tell you without finding out how you felt; I was scared.  Believe me, I had *no* intention of telling you all this tonight." 

"What *did* you plan to do?" she asked quietly, her voice surprising him. 

"I was going to try and `test the waters', see if there was anything there, on your side.  You know, buy you flowers in *February* for once and see what reaction I got."  He smiled wistfully and Donna felt a smile pull at her own lips.  "I figured that, if things were meant to happen, they would, eventually."  He let out a chuckle, obviously annoyed with himself.  "I didn't count on not being able to control my jealous streak," he admitted.  "I mean, I've had it under control for this long, I thought I'd be able to handle it.  Tonight though, I just...Sam made a remark and...we'd had such a good time, we were so close; you were sharing my seat, practically sitting on top of me.  We were sharing food, laughing, and talking.  I wanted more moments like that to happen between us, gradually, to get us to where I wanted us to be.  Then, you got hit on by *Blane* and my plans all went to hell." 

"So, if you intended taking things slowly, and you had plans, did you ever figure out *my* feelings?  What *I* might want?"  She was looking at him pointedly but he could see traces of a smile in her eyes. 

"I think I did, but you're really the best person to tell me if I'm right or not." 

Donna stood and walked to the window again, absently crossing her arms across her chest.  "What exactly are you *saying*, Josh?  What do you *want*?" 

He was tempted to walk towards her and force her to look at him but he remained seated while he answered.  "I want to go out with you, have a relationship with you," he said honestly.  "I just...How would you feel about that?" 

"I don't know," she admitted, turning around to face him again and rubbing her hands over her face.  "Maybe too much has happened for us to work.  I...The last thing I'd want is to lose you as a friend, Josh, to ruin what we have now." 

"What do you mean `too much has happened'?" he asked apprehensively. 

"Cliff.  Amy," she replied quietly, almost afraid to mention their names. 

"What do they have to do with anything?  They're in the past Donna, I want to know about the future, *our* future." 

"Josh, they have *everything* to do with this," she stated firmly, meeting his eyes.  "You were so mad at me about Cliff, have you ever *really* forgiven me?  As for Amy, well, you guys didn't exactly have the best relationship; I wouldn't want us to end up like that.  I mean, sure you still talk to her, but only if you *have* to; I couldn't handle that happening to us." 

"Okay, firstly, Cliff," Josh said.  "I never really had anything to forgive you for, Donna.  You made a mistake and -" 

"And you bailed me out," she interrupted to say.  "Josh, you could have lost your job.  *I* can't forgive *myself* for putting you in that position so how can you not be mad at me for it?" 

"Because I know you must have had your reasons for keeping quiet about the diary.  Donna, I admit I was pissed.  I felt betrayed that you were with a guy who is pretty much an enemy to me; I was hurt that you could do that.  But, it never annoyed me to have to help you out; believe me, I would have been mad as hell if you *hadn't* asked me for help.  If you'd gone to someone else, or if you'd kept quiet and ended up on charges, I would have felt that you didn't trust me, or didn't have any faith in our relationship.  I will do everything in my power to help you with *anything*, I always would have and I always will," he vowed.  "The person I was *really* mad at with all that was *Cliff*.  He should never have put you in that position.  I was also mad at *myself*, I should have done something sooner," he whispered the last part, thinking back to the words of Joey Lucas at the State of the Union.  He raised his voice to its normal level again.  "But I don't want to dwell on this, Donna.  Like I said, that's in the past, it's over, we've moved on." 

Donna met his eyes again and searched his face, finding that he was being completely honest with her.  She sat down in the chair and let out a long sigh.  Josh broke the silence to discuss the other point she'd mentioned. 

"You said you wouldn't want you and I to end up like Amy and I did; that would never happen," he assured her.  "Dating Amy was about proving a point.  With you, I have no points to prove; you know me too well for that.  I don't want to forget about my relationship with Amy," he said and Donna looked at him sharply, eyes wide.  "Dating her," he continued, "made me realize that I can fight to keep a relationship going; that I don't have to give up as easily as I used to.  Amy and I fought *a lot* but we worked through things, well, actually we ignored them, which just caused more problems.  Being with her also taught me that she's not the type of woman I want to date.  I don't want to spend what little free time I have *fighting* with someone.  Sure, you and I have disagreements but we sort them out logically; you argue with me and I argue back but they never develop into fights because we won't let them.  We don't need to be that way with each other.  You inspire me, Donna.  When you don't agree with something, I know it's because I either haven't explained it properly or because I haven't been in a position to tell you everything.  I can't stand it when that happens, I need you to be *proud* of me, to tell me I'm doing the right thing.  I've never been that way with anyone before, Donna.  Usually, I tell someone what I think and don't bother to listen to their answer; I guess I'm selfish that way."  Donna snorted and Josh smirked a little before continuing earnestly.  "With you though, it's different.  I know I don't always listen to you but, when I don't, it's for a valid reason; one of two reasons actually."  She gave him a confused look and he explained.  "Either I'm incredibly busy and know that I don't have time to devote the attention to you that you need, and deserve - I don't like doing things just halfway, I like to see them through, you know that - or, you're talking about a guy, and I *never* want to hear about that." 

"But what if we *did* end up like that, Josh?  What if it didn't work?"  Her voice was cracking and Josh strived for the words to calm and convince her. 

"Donna, I can't make any guarantees, I wish I could; but, I promise you that I will do everything I can to make sure that *never* happens.  I couldn't bear to lose your friendship either, but I also can't bear the thought of not giving this, us, a chance.  I don't want another regret in my life; I have enough of those already.  I've lost too many people that I cared about deeply, I won't give you up without a fight."  As he looked at her, he saw the tears welling up in her eyes and it gave him the strength to continue.  "Anyway, I don't think we'll ever have to consider that, and I certainly don't want to consider it before we've even had a *date*; that's being defeatist and that's definitely not in my nature, nor is it in yours," he pointed out. 

"Yeah.  I...Okay, what do we do?" she murmured, not trusting her voice. 

"What do *you* want to do?" he asked.  "I don't want to pressure you into anything, Donna.  Like I said, I had planned on taking things slowly, letting you realize my feelings and giving you a chance to deal with them the way you wanted.  Just because things have been brought out into the open sooner, it doesn't mean they're out of your control." 

"I just...I don't know where to start," she admitted.  "We know each other so well already, where do we begin?" 

He smiled at her warmly; she was voicing that she *did* want to try a relationship and Josh felt his heart beat faster again.  "Well, how about we go out for a drink tomorrow night?" he suggested. 

"I dunno, Josh," she replied through a small grin.  "It depends." 

"On what?" he asked quickly, worrying she was changing her mind. 

"Well, is it just going to be *us* there, or will Sam, CJ, Toby and Charlie be joining us?" 

He let out a laugh and grinned.  "It'll just be us," he promised.  "Our first date." 

"Okay then, count me in."  She returned his huge smile and chuckled a little. 

"What are you laughing at?" 

"Nothing.  It's just that this is not exactly what I expected to happen tonight." 

"No, me either," he admitted.  "But I'm glad it did."  Donna nodded her head as Josh glanced at his watch.  "It's late, I should get going, although, I really don't want to."  She gave him a pointed look.  "Hey," he said casually, "I'm not trying to rush you, I didn't mean...*that*.  It's just, I'm gonna go home tonight and I know I'll end up thinking about the fact that when I kissed you, I was rewarded with a slap; it doesn't exactly do wonders for my ego, you know," he said with a rueful grin. 

"Well, there *is* a way to remedy that, to make you forget about it and replace it with something else for you to think about," Donna said shyly.  He looked at her hopefully and she stood up, beckoning him towards her.  Once he was standing in front of her, they looked at each other and stood stock still, staying silent.  Donna reached out a tentative hand to wrap around his back while Josh extended his hand to place it on her waist.  He finally put his other hand around her and pulled her close to him.  She laid her head on his shoulder, wrapping her other arm around him and clasping her hands together.  Still, they remained silent.  Eventually, Josh used one hand to move her back a little, so that she was facing him again.  They each saw their own nervousness reflected back from the other and burst out laughing. 

"C'mere," Josh murmured, bringing his lips to hers.  The kiss deepened quickly but ended just as fast.  He pulled her into a tight hug and they listened to their rapid breaths, each letting out contented sighs before pulling apart.  "I'll see you in a few hours, Donnatella," he whispered. 

"Do you want me to call you a cab?" 

He shook his head.  "No, I think I'd rather walk."  Donna looked at him like he was crazy.  "It's been a long, difficult night," he explained, and then rapidly added, "with a fantastic ending.  But, I think I need to clear my head a little, get my thoughts together.  It's not that far, I'll be fine." 

Donna didn't look sure but she nodded her head slowly.  "Okay, I'll see you later."  He stepped forward again and kissed her temple, then picked up his coat from the couch and left her apartment.  Donna locked the door behind him and watched him through her window for a while, until he turned a corner out of her street. 

Josh took out his cellphone and flipped through the stored numbers until he found the one he was looking for; he then hit `send'. 

"Josh?" CJ answered quickly, having seen his name on the caller ID and wondering what was wrong; she hadn't expected to hear from him. 

"Hey, CJ.  It's fixed," he said almost triumphantly. 

"What?  Josh, I can hardly hear you.  Where are you?" CJ practically shouted; falling into the usual trap that just because she couldn't hear Josh, it didn't mean he couldn't hear her. 

"I'm walking home," he replied, increasing the volume of his voice. 

"You're going *home*?" CJ asked incredulously.  "What happened?" 

"It's fixed," he repeated; CJ let out a large breath of relief.  "I'm going home because we don't want to rush things; we need to take this slowly." 

"Good, I'm glad it worked out okay, Josh.  I want to hear all about it tomorrow," she instructed. 

"Yeah.  Goodnight, CJ," he replied.  He had no intention of relaying the whole conversation to her, just the bare bones; he wanted to keep the rest private.  Snapping his cellphone shut and putting it into his pocket, he drew his coat around him more closely, beginning to feel the cold.  "At least it's better than a cold shower," he muttered to himself.  His mind wandered back to Donna and he quickened his pace, wanting nothing more than to go home and sleep, having a good idea of what that night's dream would be about. 

While Josh was continuing his walk home, Donna was changing into her pajamas and climbing into bed, replaying the night's events to herself and smiling as she remembered the second kiss she and Josh had shared. 

CJ, meanwhile, was being hurried along by Toby.  He was standing outside the bar, holding a cab door open for her while Sam and Charlie were already huddled inside.  She entered the cab with a huge smile on her face and grinned at the questioning looks of her companions.  When they couldn't take it anymore, Toby demanded to know what she was smiling about.  As she filled them in on her brief conversation with Josh, Sam, Charlie, and even Toby, felt their mouths curve into smiles as well. 


End file.
